Tuesday, October 19, 2010

10 excuses to NOT go running

  1. "I don't want to" - Well fine then. Don't do it. Enjoy the couch and the tv and the cake. (Which the fatty will say not so sarcastically, "I will!") There was no getting me in the mood to run or to exercise at all. The most I would do is walk the dog down the driveway and throw a tennis ball but I don't think a chuck-it counts for legitimate arm work-out. There is no changing a fatty mind until said fatty realizes they're A. In fact a fatty.  B. They have to exercise to lose weight. Which leads me to...
  2. "I'll just eat healthier instead"  - This might work. A little. I know for me though it's going to take a long long time to eat off 150+ excess pounds of weight. It's just delusional thoughts from a lazy mind. I know now and I know I knew then that diet change without exercise doesn't stick. 
  3. "Running just isn't really my thing, I like cycling and hiking" - Ok. I do like cycling and hiking. Do I cycle and hike? No. Why? Because it's hard work. Why can't I handle it? Because I'm out of shape because I don't exercise! I fully plan on incorporating cycling, a sport I loved in high school and frequently biked 100 miles a week recreationally, and hiking into my workout regime as cross training options but I know that saying running isn't my thing and pointing to other activities I once loved is just a classic denial tool. When asked to go running and when I respond with that answer both I and the asker knew I was being a lazy fat bum. There's no denying it. 
  4. "I'm worried that my joints won't be able to handle this much weight" - This is a fairly legitimate excuse and shows that the user probably googled it. The general consensus is that you start with what you can handle. I just finished Day 10 and I was able to walk/jog 2.5 miles tonight. That's not a long distance in anyones book but I am proud of that accomplishment and proud that I pushed through the muscle ache to make it happen. Your body was made to run. Made to move! I plan on not wasting that ability any longer. I don't think most of us fatties could move long enough to do damage to ourselves anyway, it takes a lot of energy to move this much weight!
  5. "I don't have time" - Bullshit. I didn't have time either. You know what I did have time for though? Hours and hours and hours of TV. Want to hear my lineup? I'm going to try to go from memory as I watch most of my shows online and have no idea what network or day they actually air - Chuck, House, HIMYM, Big Bang Theory, Entourage, Boardwalk Empire, Bored to Death, Bones, Stargate Universe, Eureka, Running Wilde(funniest show on tv, please don't cancel it FOX!), Supernatural, Sons of Anarachy... I'm forgetting a few but on top of my 40+ hour work week I managed to find time for no less than 11 hours of television a week, not including movies or social outings. Having kids may take some of that extra time away but I think we can all squeeze in at least half an hour a day. 
  6. "It's just too hard" - Yes it is. It's really hard but is it any easier to be fat? About two years ago I kept falling asleep at work, in the car, pretty much everywhere, I finally went to the doctor and they suggested a sleep study. At the sleep study I woke up 180 times in 2 hours from the fat around my neck cutting off my airway. Since then I've slept with a CPAP machine that fixes my sleep apnea. Is this sexy? No. Is this fun for me? No. Is this more than slightly embarrassing? You bet your sweet bum it is. Being fat is way harder than exercising. The anxiety, the guilt, the negative emotions and your own body failing you. This is hard and it makes running seem easy.
  7. "Running is boring" - There is this great new digital device called a mp3 player. I don't know if you've ever heard of it but it does this amazing thing, it plays music right into your ears! It's crazy! In truth running for me right now consists of me picking out a light post ahead and forcing myself not to stop until I get to that post, then walking for a little bit to breathe and then running to another light post then past that one to the next one. I can't think of anything other than that light post and how far away it seems at that moment. I know eventually this will get easier and then I may start to get bored but right now that is a terrible excuse not to move. You can always find a friend too! I am running with a fat friend right now but I know many of my fit friends I think would gladly run at my pace with me if I asked them to. Our friends are our friends because they care and our healthy friends want us to be healthy! 
  8. "People will stare at the fatty" - aka "I'm embarrassed". Guess what? I don't care anymore. I hope that people seeing my mass moving down the sidewalk will motivate them to move. It's kind of hilarious how we all have this assumption that people stare at us or that their world will revolve around mocking us. It's just not reality. Anyone who does can jump off a bridge, it's not about them, it's about me being healthy. Who knows, you might see some of your fatty neighbors out there running after they watch the pounds melt off you! Be the motivation for others. 
  9. "It's too hot... It's too cold.... It's too rainy...." - Ahhh the weather argument. Ok buy some appropriate clothes. Even wal-mart sells workout clothes that can keep you cool (bottle of water helps. I'm running in Phoenix at night too), or warm or dry. The weather should not stop you from being healthy. I am excited to run in the rain and the cold. I'm kind of crazy but I love inclement weather. 
  10. "Where I live isn't conducive to it" - Everywhere is conducive to running. Anywhere you live you can find a place to run. Even if you're in a hotel in a supposedly dangerous city you could still run around the parking lot until you achieve your distance or time. At the moment I am running around and around and around my block. Is it repetitive? Yup. Could I run somewhere else? Sure. I run here because it's convenient. Someday I will live somewhere else and I will have to figure out a new route and that will be ok too. If it's dangerous, or you think it is, run with one of those previously mentioned friends or get a dog, they love running! 

So that concludes the 10 main excuses that this Fatty always provided as reasons not to run. I hope some of them touch a little too close for comfort and you too can work through why they aren't legitimate for you.

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